For a successful companionship
between you and your dog there has to be a strong bond. The bonding process
has little to do with the age of the dog or the breed. Some people believe
that they must have a new puppy to establish a strong bond which is certainly
not the case at all.
Dogs can form new bonds with humans at any stage of their life. Take for
example, a working police dog or a guide dog for the blind. The first human
contact is of course, the breeder. Second is the puppy minder or walker with
whom the puppy spends around six months being socialised but not trained
beyond the basic commands. The dog then moves to a training centre to be
trained for a specific purpose. Once trained, the dog begins working with
its new owner. Such a dog has spent time in various homes with different
humans all of whom have established a bond with the animal. The closest bond
will form with the last human in the chain but the dog will never forget
the relationship between its previous owners.
Bonding does not require you to purchase a puppy. In fact some of the closest,
loyal bonds between humans and dogs are established with rescue dogs. Anyone
who believes that the purchase of a pedigree puppy will automatically result
in a dog that worships and respects the owner is badly mistaken. The only
way that a solid, trusting bond can be created is through sincere and wholehearted
love of the dog. Simply through this genuine affection, the dog will know
without question, that he or she is wanted and important to the owner. It
is impossible for a dog receiving this kind of affection to fail to worship
its owner unconditionally in return. A good understanding of the canine mind,
and responsible behaviour, especially in training, will add much to this
basic foundation, but without the foundation being present in the first place,
there is no way to coerce or trick the dog into loving an owner who doesn't
really care for the dog.
Having said that, an abusive owner will have a dog which looks up to him
or her, and which is often quite obedient, but through fear. This is not
what we would call a bond, it's merely a respect of position which unfortunately
all dogs possess, regardless of the behaviour of the owner. I enjoy hearing
about abusive owners who are amazed when their dog failed to protect them
when they were under attack. Though this is not always the case, it is true
that many dogs, even highly protective breeds have been known to fail to
protect their owner when under threat, due to the dog somehow knowing that
the owner isn't worthy of his protection. It's the kind of natural justice
which such people deserve.
Dogs bond with humans during the time they spend on a one to one basis. The
dog can bond with each member of the family in different ways but will form
a stronger or “working” bond with one individual person. It is the interaction
between the owner (leader) and the dog that forms the bond. This is where
the knowledge of how a dog's mind works and understanding the basics of dog
training comes to the fore. How the owner reacts to situations will influence
the bonding process during the first few months of the relationship. Basically
the dog needs to be confident in the owner's abilities as its “pack leader”
and secure in the knowledge that the owner is committed to the dog's welfare.
Then and only then, will the dog respect its new owner's authority.
Creating a truly strong bond between two individuals, in this case the human
and the dog, does not involve just caring for the animal. The relationship
between the human and the dog begins as soon as the dog joins the family.
Once the dog is settled, forming a bond is simply increasing the strength
of the relationship. This requires:
• Spending time together on a one to one basis, travelling in the car
together, walking in the park, walking through a town and meeting other people,
going to busy events such as fete's and fairs. Anywhere in fact that exposes
the dog to unusual situations wherein the dog looks to the owner for guidance
and security.
• Developing solid communication by learning to read the dog's body
language and responding accordingly. For example, if the dog is showing signs
of fear or anxiety in the presence of another dog, the owner must be able
to read the dog's signals and diffuse the situation by leading the dog away,
or dealing with it in some other way which promotes the owner as responsible,
and most of all, leader in the eyes of the dog. This reinforces the owner's
position as a strong and capable leader. The dog learns to trust the owner
thereby strengthening the bond.
• Training the animal in a firm but fair manner using reward based
methods. The owner must be able to correct unwanted behaviour in a calm and
consistent manner without being verbally or physically abusive. This establishes
a level of mutual respect with the dog understanding the boundaries and what
constitutes good behaviour.
• Encouraging the dog to be an active participant in the family's day
to day life. A dog that is shut away for most of the day and has little interaction
with the family has no positive guidance from the owner. Negative behavioural
issues such as chewing, barking, house soiling and a poor response to training
can arise from boredom and a lack of mental stimulation. If the dog harbours
feelings of isolation and confusion it cannot bond with its owner fully,
though it will still pine and crave attention. The owner should be solely
responsible for feeding and grooming the dog as part of the bonding process.
• Understanding that the bonding process does not happen overnight
but grows stronger in response to the owners input into the relationship.
Far too much time is spent on “humanising” the dog. Instead of thinking “dog”
the owner places human emotions and reasoning behind a dog's actions. For
example, many humans see house soiling as disgusting or the dog misbehaving
or even doing it deliberately to annoy its owner. The dog however is behaving
as nature intended. If the owner reacts to house soiling with anger or impatience
this confuses the dog who only knows that its master is angry. The dog responds
to the situation with either fear or aggression. Amidst such confusion the
bonding process cannot develop, and the problem certainly will get worse,
not better, spelling more problems for both owner and dog.
It is the communication between the owner and dog that creates the bond which
in turn is needed for the basis of obedience training. The primary purpose
of dog training is to let the dog know who is in charge and how you want
the dog to behave, but without being domineering or forceful. This cannot
be achieved if the owner is treating the dog as a miniature human. The dog
needs to be set boundaries which are enforced on a daily basis. It needs
the owner to be fair, consistent and understanding. Few dogs can cope with
households charged with high emotions, arguments or stress. They just do
not understand the concept of, “I'm having a bad day”. A strong bond cannot
be formed if the dog is constantly receiving mixed messages regarding what
is or what isn't allowed. Confusion is a sure way of breaking down communication
and thereby demolish the bonding process.
Trust, loyalty and devotion comes with time based on mutual respect, communication
and understanding. As any owner with a devoted dog will tell you, it is well
worth the effort.
reprinted with kind permission from Martin Popham
Dog Trainer & Obedience Specialist www.K9Obedience.co.uk - Free Dog
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